Happy New Year! It’s already the second week of 2019 and I’m sure many of us are back at work. Well, I am. And with a new year comes resolutions, personal or professional goals, or a list of things you want to achieve. After reflecting much of what 2018 was like, holistically, I prefer learning from some of the lessons that took place and implementing it into 2019.

Love who you are

We all human beings and we all have our flaws but it’s important to take care of ourselves. Most importantly, just to love who you are as a person. It might sound uncanny but not having self-love can ultimately destroy your self-esteem and the people you surround yourself with. You deserve happiness; no matter what shape or form it comes in so learn to accept yourself for who you are and embrace it. Remember, there’s no one like you out there in the world. Be who you are and own it. It does take time and it took me a while to love me for me to go at your own pace.

Say No more often

We never want to let people down or feel that saying no won’t come with better opportunities but trust me, saying no is a good thing. You can’t always be a people pleasurer or have brands constantly expecting you to be at events. I say no quite a bit merely for the fact that I have a full-time job, might have a gut feeling it’s not morally correct or, it doesn’t resonate with me. It’s not worth stressing over whether or not a brand will work with you or that person won’t ever speak to you again. Do what’s right for you and if they have faith in your brand or love you as a person, they will understand.

Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life …Don’t let the noise of others’ opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition.
– Steve Jobs

Let them go

One of the most difficult lessons I had to overcome was to let go of people who don’t value you as a person. I tried so hard to keep friendships alive but never got the same in return. My one friend once said to me, “Stephanie, friends are seasonal and it’s okay”.

Stop trying to make friendships work when the other party isn’t bringing their side. Rather use your energy on people who are still sticking around rather than dwell on friends that aren’t genuine. I have a handful of friends that are pure and real and, I make the time to stay in contact with them as best as I can. Rather nurture the true ones you have left rather than sulking about people who don’t care.

Shit happens

Imagine if our lives were all perfect? In the real world, it’s not the case and social media is a huge contributor in faking people’s lives. Let’s be real. Shit happens and it’s okay. I speak a lot on my YouTube channel about the financial challenges I’m currently enduring. All we need to do is raise above the horrible situation you might’ve found yourself and adapt.

Don’t portray that your life is moonshine and roses when in reality you’re falling apart. Ask for help where necessary. If your life is showcased online, be true to your followers by saying you’re having a hard time. No need to elaborate on the situation if you’re not comfortable talking about it but know that we all human and, we all go through things we cannot control.

Don’t be afraid to fail

The need to succeed is real. It’s human nature not too. Whether it be professional success, receiving academic distinctions, wanting more money, etc, we want success one way or another. What people don’t realize that in order to reach that success, we fail in some form of way. It’s okay. Pick yourself up and try another avenue.

Beating yourself up about it won’t reach that goal. It might take you a few months, it might even take you years. Don’t take your eyes from the prize. You’ll get to your end goal eventually.

People will always judge/hate on you

Whether it be friends, family members, or in my case, the blogger community, someone will always say negative things about you. It’s upsetting and in some instances, depressing because we all want to be liked or praised for something we most passionately enjoy. Haters will be haters and brushing off negative comments isn’t as easy as just mentioning it. You tend to self doubt your place in the world and it’s very frustrating.

A friend once told me (I have lots who just tell me things), that if someone hates on you, it means you made it. So next time you get a crude remark from anyone, just remind yourself that you made it and they need to evaluate themselves. The world is filled with trolls so don’t give them any satisfaction that they ruined your day.

Unfollow people who make you feel worthless

Social media is a world that literally can make or break you. There are people that post to brag, that inspire you to travel or simply want to make you aware of specific things. Follow people who stipulate your desire and mind with their images and posts, unfollow people who make you feel worthless about yourself and your life. There’s nothing worse than having people plaster your feed with undesirable goals or who make you feel small.

I literally muted a fellow blogger because she constantly comments indirectly towards me even though I’ve spoken to her and tried to give her the benefit of the doubt. Just switch off. That mute button is there for a reason.

Make yourself a priority

It’s not selfish to put yourself first. You need to look after you; mentally and physically, instead of always taking care of others. I make a point to take myself out on dates. Sounds strange but you’ll thank me later. Have coffee alone, watch a movie in your own company, or even travel solo. You might surprise yourself by learning a thing or two you didn’t know.

You can also watch how 2018 was for me and my plans for 2019.

That’s some of the lessons I’m taking with me into 2019. What are the lessons you feel are necessary?

Until next time.

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